Homeschooling isn't the Goal

That probably sounds like a strange thing for a homeschool mom to say.

After all, I've been homeschooling since 2012. I've helped other families homeschool. I've been the president of my county's homeschool group. I'm building homeschool planning tools. My website has an entire section dedicated to homeschooling.

And yet, I still believe the goal isn't homeschooling.

The goal is raising children who know God, love truth, think critically, take responsibility for their lives, and grow into healthy, strong adults who build thriving, Jesus-centered families of their own.

Homeschooling is simply one of the tools we're using to get there.

I think this distinction matters because I've watched people on both sides miss it.

Some people become so focused on homeschooling that it becomes the goal itself. They start measuring success by how long they've homeschooled, how closely they follow a particular educational philosophy, or whether they're doing things "the right way."

Other people reject homeschooling because they assume it's about bashing traditional school or being determined to buck the norm.

Sometimes the groups even judge each other harshly.

I don't think either group is asking the right question.

The real question is:

What are we trying to accomplish?

For me, the answer starts with faith.

More than anything else, I want my children to know God and learn to walk with Him. I want them to understand His Word, recognize His voice, and trust Him even when life doesn't go according to plan.

I want them to know how to find answers, think critically, and continue learning long after they leave my home.

I want them to become men and women of character who can take responsibility for their lives, build healthy relationships, and contribute something meaningful to the world around them.

That's the goal.

Homeschooling is one way to pursue it.

Stewardship

One of the biggest reasons we homeschool is stewardship.

God entrusted these children to me.

That doesn't mean I own them. It doesn't mean I need to control every aspect of their lives. It doesn't mean they never make mistakes or never encounter ideas I disagree with.

It simply means that I am responsible for them.

Children spend an enormous amount of time absorbing ideas, values, habits, and assumptions from the people around them. Teachers influence them. Friends influence them. Coaches influence them. Books influence them. Movies influence them.

None of those influences are neutral.

People naturally pass on what they believe, whether they intend to or not.

That's one reason homeschooling appealed to me. It allows me to be much more intentional about the influences shaping my children during their formative years.

It's not about fear or isolation.

And it's certainly not about control.

It's about stewardship.

If someone handed you a priceless piece of art and asked you to care for it, you wouldn't leave it sitting out in the rain and hope for the best. You would be thoughtful about where it went, who handled it, and how it was protected.

The mind of a child is infinitely more valuable than a piece of art.

Being intentional about the influences in their lives isn't controlling. It's responsible.

At the same time…

Homeschooling is not a doctrine.

This may not be the most popular thing to say in some homeschool circles, but I believe it's true.

I've had children in different educational settings. I've homeschooled some all the way through. I've pulled children out of school. I've had children return to school.

Every child is different.

Every family is different.

Every season is different.

I do believe homeschooling is an incredible option, and for our family it has been the ideal choice for most of our kids. But I also believe there are situations where another option may be the better fit.

The goal is not to homeschool for the longest amount of time.

The goal is to do what best serves the child and the family.

Freedom

This goal is also why I encourage homeschool parents to embrace the freedom that homeschooling offers.

One of the biggest surprises for many new homeschoolers is how long it takes to stop thinking like a school.

We leave the building, but we often carry the assumptions with us.

We assume school has to take eight hours.

We assume learning only happens when a child is sitting quietly at a desk.

We assume curriculum must be completed exactly as written and on time.

We assume having to change plans means we messed something up.

None of those things are necessarily true.

Homeschooling gives families the freedom to adapt, adjust, experiment, and build a custom educational experience around the actual child sitting in front of them.

That freedom is one of the greatest gifts homeschooling offers.

When my kids are thirty years old…

I won't be asking whether we finished every workbook or completed every lesson exactly as planned.

I'll be asking different questions.

Do they love God?

Do they know how to seek truth?

Can they think for themselves?

Are they mentally tough enough to endure hardship without falling apart?

Do they trust God when circumstances don't make sense?

Can they navigate conflict?

Are they kind and strong in appropriate measure?

Are they building strong families and healthy relationships?

Do they take responsibility for their lives?

Those are the things that matter most to me.

If homeschooling helps us accomplish those goals, wonderful. If another tool serves a particular child better in a particular season, that's okay too.

Because the goal was never homeschooling.

The goal has always been raising children who are prepared to live well, love God, and faithfully walk the path He has for them.